In just a few days most people will celebrate a new year. Some large number of people will also make promises about things they will do to make changes in their life.
I am not one of them.
In truth, I never have been a resolution maker. Mostly, whenever you make a resolution it lives in the future, “I will . . . ” Magickally speaking, that means it goes nowhere. It’s much more powerful to state what you ARE DOING (note the present tense) than to always keep it in a state of potential. As well, it’s too easy to give in to the enthusiasm of a new convert and get grand with the plans. I urge you to consider this: you cannot make change until you have made room for those changes in your life.
However, there is so much energy here to be tapped as with any cusp between times and as witches we have three natural times each calendar year to shed the old and welcome the new.
Our birthing-day. This is the most powerful one for me. I take time before the date itself to chronicle the past year. I look at my achievements and record them, honoring myself for having done so much. I especially am proud of those things I did that I did not plan to do. For me, those were opportunities that I took, rather than putting off, or ignoring because they weren’t “in the plan.”
Samhain, the witch’s new year. This day represents the “pause” point after the heavy work of the triple harvest (grain, fruit, and meat). Our ancestors worked long hours for many months to get it all done before the first freeze made it impossible to do much more. Samhain is a good time to reflect on your achievements, honor your ancestors, and relax into the (relative) quiet of winter’s coming.
January 1st, the Gregorian new year. For all that some call the calendar a meaningless invention, there is a whole lot of free-floating energy to be found in hordes of people recognizing that this is an opportunity for change. The energy is neutral, good, or negative, depending on your perception. For years I discounted it, believing that resolutions made now were grandiose and without true thought. But when we make choices that arise from self-knowledge we can use this time to make “course corrections” so that we are closer to our true desires and clearer about what we want to manifest in the coming year.
A desire to write a novel feels right at Samhain, but you haven’t had the time to write more than an outline since then. Use the Gregorian New Year to re-focus on completing a chapter, a section, or a specific word count. Instead of berating ourselves for not losing 50 lbs, we can set our goal to something more like adding fruit or vegetables to each meal, drinking more water throughout the day, or going for a 10 minute walk each day.
As eager as we might be for a fresh start we are mindful that the old never goes out with a whimper. Changing habits can be as difficult as quitting drinking for an alcoholic or heroin for an addict. Its not just about willpower, although having the fortitude to deny one’s self that which once caused us pleasure has a lot to do with willpower. It seems that creating new habits to replace the old ones is the most successful strategy for making permanent change.
Small changes feel harder, and don’t give us as big a result as fast as we want it, but tend to be the changes that we maintain. And so the longer-term result is much bigger and easier to maintain. Science tells us that if we want to make something a habit we have to do it for at least 30 consecutive days and the month of January is conveniently just right for that.